Does This Color Make Me Look Gay?

We spend a lot of time in our parlor (a word I'd never used in the first 48 years of my life). It's a nice place to sit with our coffee and newspaper in the morning or a glass of wine in the evening. It gets morning sun and affords a great view over the main street. You can even see the ocean from here. If we're not in the kitchen or flopped in front of the TV, we're probably in the parlor.

So why has it taken us so long to paint this room? It's been this dark-green color since we moved in, which went oh-so-well with the blood-red carpet. The carpet disappeared six months ago, but the walls remained green.

Until yesterday. Out came the paintbrushes, up went the ladders, and pop went the can openers. Three new paint cans, three new brushes, and three new rollers. We're in bidness.

First step: put primer over the dark green paint. I like to do primer coats because you don't have to be very good. It doesn't have to cover very well, and you don't really have to get everything. If I get 90% coverage I'm happy. I get to play with the paint without having to worry about feathering edges, cutting in, or any of that technical stuff.

After the primer comes the first color coat. We're using two colors: one on the walls and a lighter shade on the ceiling. I did the ceiling while Kathy started on the walls. If we do this right, we'll both finish at about the same time. We're a good team.

I'll just come right out and say it. We're painting the room purple. Yup, it's our lavender love lounge. Really, it's not so bad, and it complements the old wallpaper in the adjoining rooms (which may not say much for the wallpaper, I realize). The new color lightens up the room quite a bit.

Paint colors have funny names. Kathy will tell you that I deliberately avoid reading the silly names written on the back of the paint samples so that they don't color (sorry) my decision. I don't want to know that one shade of white is called Wedding Cake while another is named Shroud of Turin or Albino Bicuspid or something like that.

Case in point: Our new ceiling color is called Mystic Fairy. Really? Can you see walking into Home Depot and asking for a gallon of Mystic Fairy? "Would you like the matching lipstick with that, sir?" Stupid paint companies.